Connor ‘The Crusher’ WWE Tribute

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xfS0deQlgHw

This video really touched us here at TPJ. We would like to congratulate the WWE and all involved in this process and extend our deepest sympathies to Connor’s family. He looked like a great kid and we wish we’d have known him. RIP Connor, sleep well pal xxx

You’ll do what I say…or these guys will have words with you kapeesh

You'll do what I say...or these guys will have words with you kapeesh

An Army of Donkeys led by a Lion is better than an Army of Lions led by a Donkey – Genguis Khan

Tinder is Saving the Irish Economy!

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I am a recent joiner of the social media Application Tinder. I originally joined it for the craic and based on a funny recommendation and kind of to see what all the fuss was about but now I like it.  The basic concept of this app (abbreviated as the young folks call it nowadays) is to find true love forever or, contrarily, true love for the night. You have both options available to you based on your personal preference. Although this short article is primarily concerning Tinder and the Irish Economy, I feel I have to delve a little into the general concept.

There has always been a taboo over internet dating. A general cloud of pity always hung over any sentence which began with ‘We met Online!” when a couple retold their ‘Cute Meet’ story but now, maybe over the past tow years, this has become no longer the case. Internet dating nowadays is kind of fun. I didn’t think I’d get it or like it at first but after only a week on the app, it’s such a good laugh. There is a world of choice out there and from their photos, absolute babes. On initial beginnings, you judge another person based on their appearance (no more so than in a pub) from the one of the six photos they may have posted of themselves on their profile. These photos also convey outward personality of smiling situations and happy memories of that person so it’s not all about looks (although they help). Your profile also lists your shared interests with the other person – (Glee and Disney always seem to be popping up in mine). Then If both parties click Like on each other, signalising their common interest, they are ‘Matched’ and then are given the opportunity to begin a conversation with the other. After getting to know each other via instant chat, they might agree to meet and go on their first date wherever they wish. This is the basic concept – looking at it like that, there is absolutely nothing dodgy about that. A person gets to introduce themselves to another with no start-up shame. There is no over-pulsating hearts and sweaty hands on approach. You just say hello through a text and take it from there. You have the chance to speak to any person instantly and if you choose not to, they are none the wiser because the first choice is anonymous. What a lovely concept. Practically speaking, it works too. For everyone in the country! Here’s why –

This is obviously intended to be somewhat humourous but it is based on the small underlying fact that Tinder is positively helping the Irish Economy and may save the country from complete Bankruptcy. With online dating, young Irish gentlemen are being encouraged to ask and take the lady (or the other gentleman if that be your taste) out on formal dates. They are now inviting their possible loves or lovers out to restaurants, bars and other social events which might make for an enjoyable evening. Restaurants and Cocktail Bars are now filled with couples on their ‘First Dates’. Our young population is now spending money on Art exhibitions, or Cinema trips or Day’s out at the Zoo for the fun of it. Before the dating culture became fashionable, Irish men would have solely relied on a sweaty nightclub and a skinful of Pre-drinking cheap Centra vodka to meet the love of their life. Now they are contributing to the Irish economy by actually spending money in local areas.

I’m sure several Irish lads would have never been on a date before, let alone a first date with a girl they have never met. Gone (or going) are the days of meeting her in a Club, buying five 2euro shots each, getting hammered, sweatily grind-dancing with her for forty minutes and then wearing the face off each other until closing time. You don’t have to falling drunkenly into bed together and leave the next morning with a sense of shame, a sore head and a girl who will never call you again because she puked in your shoes. Fear not lads, the day has come now when you get to know her first and then take her out in the hope to impress her and then ransack the sheets after if she’ll have you. The Irish economy is booming with shy couples who have spoken to each other for weeks on their phones but who have only met for the first time that night. Bashful has become the most popular dwarf.

In summary, Tinder may save local businesses from closing. If you are trying to woo her, take her somewhere fancy and spend your money on memories she’ll remember.

Plus it is absolutely great craic chatting to some absolute crazy, good-looking girls out there that you never would have met had it not been for the site.

Peace and Love and happy dating,

TPJ x

Pensive

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She pensively waits for her chance to escape,
She does not mind it inside, but her life is out in the garden.
Her food is out there, her toys are outside on the lawn
Her little wooden house that fits her body so perfectly and shields her from the rain and cold.

These were all her favourite things, and inside she could not get to them. Everything was out there –

Not in here in the kitchen. So here she waits, watching the crows through the large kitchen window that are almost mocking her
By landing on her silver bowl of food and peck pecking at her nuts, eating them greedily.
Hey they were hers!

She barks once and then twice and they flee from their theft but return almost instantly.
Her face is now pressed against the pane and her paw scrapes the window.
She paces back and forth and whines and whinges to be let out to chase them but alas, her captives are not present
They had been known to release her out the door in the past,
But they were not there to hear her plea – typical humans!

So she lies back down on her red and white, soft pillow which tickles her whiskers and watches.
Those crows will be in awful big trouble when she escapes
Mark those words, she will bite their silly black heads off and she will return their body to the foot of the door
For now all she can do is pensively wait
And never take her eyes off them. There she will wait.

Tiger Paws Junior, May 2014